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Saturday, December 24, 2011

Guest Post by me, age 11

I thought I'd share another gem of a writing sample from my youth.  This masterpiece is a sample from the sequel to Return of the Jedi. (what else would it be?)

Written by Josh Wagner and Nick Bausch (hope you don't mind, Nick)

A long time ago in a galaxy far far away..............

Episode VII Return of the Empire
     The rebels have begun construction on a new base on the planet of Endor.  now that the Empire is destroyed, the rebels are not in a hurry to complete there (yes there) base and there (yes, once again, there) worries are few.

     Little do they know on the far side of the galaxy the empire is reforming.  There (ugh) leader a dark lord from the planet Donateo, Lord Opi who is determined to crush the rebellion. He has many allies, his most powerful is the force.

The empire is finishing the last stage on a new base twice as big and three times as powerful as the Death Star.  This space station is located inside an asteroid within in impassable asteroid field. (Kind of makes you wonder how effective an offensive strategy one would launch from such a location) This space station will spell certain doom to the small band of rebels trying to restore freedom to the galaxy.....(I was nice enough to correct the spelling of galaxy -from gallexy)

Luke "It sure is a clear night outside, isn't it." (I guess this isn't a question)
Liea "You can see for miles!"
Han "What's going on out here?"
Liea  " We are just admiring the sky isn't it beautiful?"
Han "Yeah great, has anyone seen Chewie, he has a part to the power generator I'm working on for the Falcon."
Luke "Oh where are you going?" (Wow, shouldn't Liea be the one asking these questions?)
Han "No where (ugh) just fixing her up for the hell of it. (George lucas managed to go three entire movies without a single curse and we made it to the middle of the second page.)

     Han was about to turn around to leave when he saw a bright red glow shoot across the sky into the forest many miles away.

Han" Did you see that!" (more of a statement than a question, I suppose)
Liea "Yes what was it."
Han "Probably just a meteor."
Luke "I don't think so." under his breath
Liea "We better check in it is getting late and we have a busy day tomorrow."
Han "Yeah, but I think we should check it out in the morning anyway.

     They all turned around and went back into the base.
The dialogue is arguably as good, if not better than George Lucas' -especially when compared to the three most recent films. Lets just hope Lucas doesn't steal this priceless idea....

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  1. Was it 'episode VII' when you wrote it? Or IV as it should have been? It's okay, there all confused at the Lucas company too!

  2. Return of the Jedi is VI so the sequel would be VII ...the latest films are I II and III. The original Star Wars is IV, Empire is V and RoJ is VI...got it? Clear as mud.

  3. Correct,BUT, if you knew that when you and Jake wrote this, you were more prophetic than, say, The Prophets of The Dark Side (http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/Prophets_of_the_Dark_Side)